'The righteous man walks in his integrity.' Proverbs 20:7
Abraham Lincoln said, “Your core values are the deeply held beliefs that authentically describe your soul.” In Genesis 39:1-23 notice the choices Joseph made. He chose integrity over indifference, faithfulness over duplicity, honesty over deception, and his commitment to be a man of great character over compromise. He is a great role model to look at as we delve into the importance of consciously committing to be people of great character.
Google “cheating” and you’ll find a plethora of stats, articles and even advice about cheating on your spouse, your taxes, tests and much more. With the rise of social media, even secular publications are sounding the alarm on the increase of “emotional affairs.” In a recent article in Business Insider entitled 13 Facts About Cheating that Couples and Singles Should Know, the author determines that morality (or integrity) “…is the main factor keeping married people from cheating.” Flirting used to require secret phone calls, clandestine rendezvous, covert letter writing and more. Today, flirting can take place with the click of a button.
Ty Tashiro, the author of The Science of Happily Ever After: What Really Matters in the Quest of Enduring Love, terms this micro-cheating. Tashiro defines micro-cheating as “a relatively small act of emotional infidelity with someone outside of a person’s committed relationship via social media.” According to the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy, 45% of men and 35% of women have admitted to having an “emotional affair,” 60% of which begin at work. The article gives some great advice: Unfriend former high school sweethearts, set up porn-blockers on all of your computers and handheld devices, refuse to correspond with attractive colleagues outside of the work environment. “In short,” they write, “be a better human being!”
Integrity means having a good character. And good character sets boundaries. It may not always determine what you will do, but it always determines what you won't do. Character lets you realise how much you're willing to pay to get what you want. When someone in a relationship has no character, they're dangerous. The writer of Proverbs says, 'The righteous man walks in his integrity; his children are blessed after him' (Proverbs 20:7). Character doesn't have to be in the spotlight, excessively running the show. And it doesn't resort to intimidation or shaming to get its own way. The person who thinks he or she can get what they want by lying, cheating, or manipulating is sadly mistaken.
No matter where you go, the real you will eventually show up! And if you don't work on your character, you can't build healthy relationships. Genuine relationships require integrity; someone who shows consistent character in all circumstances; someone who plays by the rules and can be relied upon; someone who offers credit where credit is due; someone who lives by faith; someone who trusts God to enable them to accomplish all that he or she was created and called to do.
The Bible tells us the wicked may prosper for a season, but they won't endure. Ultimately, they will not triumph (see Proverbs 11:21). The psalmist says, 'The integrity of the upright will guide them, but the perversity of the unfaithful will destroy them' (Proverbs 11:3). The word for today is - work on your character.
Sources
1. Integrity – Dr Henry Cloud
3. The Character of God – David Pawson
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