top of page
  • Writer's pictureRevShirleyMurphy

Church Football – Author Unknown

  • Quarterback Sneak - Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.

  • Draw Play - What many children do with the bulletin during worship.

  • Halftime - The period between Sunday School and worship when many choose to leave.

  • Benchwarmer - Those who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything but sit.

  • Backfield-in-Motion - Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) during the service.

  • Staying in the Pocket - What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the Lord's work.

  • Two-minute Warning - The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up your children and belongings.

  • Instant Replay - The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week's illustrations.

  • Sudden Death - What happens to the attention span of the congregation if the preacher goes "overtime".

  • Trap - You're called on to pray and are asleep.

  • End Run - Getting out of church quick, without speaking to any guest or fellow member.

  • Flex Defense - The ability to allow absolutely nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.

  • Halfback Option - The decision of 50% of the congregation not to return for the evening service.

  • Blitz - The rush for the restaurants following the closing prayer.

146 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page